Doing dates at the earlier stages of life may seem a bit complicated, but that is the easiest and most fun time to date. When you start advancing in age, you’ll begin to meet dynamics you probably never had to deal with in your earlier years—such as a situation where your girlfriend wants to get married or break up.
The life of a man differs from that of a woman—as society or family is not harsh on men when it comes to settling down—but society, family, and other events can be savage on women, leading them to demand future security in the form of marriage, but should you cave in or bounce? Here is all you need to know:
Girlfriend wants to get married or break up—here are common reasons:
Pressure from external sources
Family, friends, and tradition may compel your girlfriend to push for a more serious relationship like marriage. I once had a friend who always complained to me about how her mother would make passes at her—reminding her that her younger sister has married, yet she keeps whoring about instead of settling into a relationship.
Now this act of labeling, insulting, and undue comparison can mount more pressure on your girlfriend to begin to demand a serious commitment in the form of marriage. So, if she is getting advanced in age, or is the eldest daughter in the house, or has parents who are not liberal, it is quite common for them to demand marriage from her.
Fear of losing you
People who fall deeply in love seek all sorts of means to secure their partners for as long as possible. This may involve the use of emotional manipulation and other forms of compulsion to get you to commit to them through marriage so they never have to worry about losing you to someone else.
This may not be love; this is sometimes obsession. A person who is thinking understands that marriage is not enough to keep someone nowadays, so it doesn’t have to be the ultimate thing. If your partner is scared of losing you, communicating deeply—with words of assurance—can help quell their anxieties.
Emotional maturity
Girls 17 to 24 may not take marriage talks seriously. However, when they exceed this age bracket of exploration or when they hit that stage of maturity irrespective of their ages, they begin to see things much more differently—thereby demanding marriage or breaking up with you as they might perceive you as unserious.
This decision is reached for their own best interest, and while it may not soothe you, you could flip the table around—picture yourself in a position where you are ready to settle down—but then you find yourself with a lady who just wants to go with the flow or just keep exploring—a hell of a frustrating experience.
Social comparison
Social comparison could play positive and negative roles in the decision-making of your girlfriend. When your girlfriend begins to compare her life with that of her friends, celebrities, family members, or random persons living around, she may irrationally decide it is time to get married to you or look for other serious persons and get married to them.
Such ladies may have serious esteem issues, which will play a big role in ruining the relationship. Supposing your relationship already has a road map on how things should go, then it will be terrible if you give in to such requests. However, if your relationship lacks a roadmap, it’s understandable as to why she is condescending to social comparisons.
The presence of other serious persons
Except you are a highly good-looking guy; you should have noticed that it is way easier for ladies to have people trying to woo them—irrespective of whether they are ugly or not. Women get more attention (because that is how nature or society has constructed the dynamics).
When a lady finds who she is more attracted to or when she finds a person who is ready to get married to her, she will often throw the get married or breakup bait. If you agree to get married, she may stay, but if you go the route of breaking up, then she will gladly fall to her plan B.
The love of kids
Some ladies genuinely love kids and would want to settle down so they could have these kids in wedlock. They feel if they have these kids outside wedlock that you wouldn’t see the need to settle down with them.
What to do when your girlfriend wants marriage or a breakup?
Depending on the reason why your girlfriend wants marriage or break up, it may be fair to listen to her or sever the relationship, but under these conditions:
- If your girlfriend is seeking marriage with you solely because she has other suitors, she is afraid of losing you, or she keeps comparing the relationship with that of others, it is fair to call things quits so she can go and find the perfect guy who will settle with her right away.
- If your girlfriend’s basis for demanding a more serious commitment from you is the lack of any clear plans for the future despite having dated for so long, your endless request for her to go with the flow, or your total avoidance of the marriage topic, then she is right to seek to leave, so you should either work towards the marriage or let her leave.
However, do not allow anyone to pressure you into a marriage that you may probably regret all the days of your life. If there are compatibility issues that can’t be reconciled, walk away from the relationship. If you are not ready to be married, do not be manipulated or bullied into it. But ensure not to hold someone back for many years—taking away their best years only to end up leaving them hanging.
Summing up
Your girlfriend wants the option of marriage or she’ll initiate a break up because of uncertainties that may be present in the relationship, like a lack of commitment through actions or words, your avoidance of taking responsibilities, or pressure from her family, age, or social circles.
